A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. The next step I take, though not the first step, for I have journeyed all my life to come to this crossroads, will be a step born of love and a step into surrender…
Until now I always seem to have been moving towards something, someone, somewhere, a destination that holds no guarantees, but in the last few days along the last few steps, steps that have slowed with each foot I put forward as if the quality of the ground beneath me was whispering gently to me “not this way” and I had only just, for the first time in a long time managed to understand that those whispers were not about how I should walk, which shoes I should wear, how long or how fast my stride was… but just a simple instruction that the road ahead was not the road for me. That perhaps the destination itself was right where I am, right who I am and right now?
The road I’ve been walking has been painful to tread. Some days I didn’t know if I could walk another step, some days the very ground beneath my feet fell away and some days it reared up to challenge me: to slap me down and break me. I never gave up the path because I believed it led somewhere, to something important but the path is endless, it comes without reward and without respite until you understand that the journey itself is the reward, and the respite is the series of moments along the path where you stop to smell the flowers, where you share the path with companions and the laughter sparks a series of unprecedented miracles of consciousness. But the road has ultimately been a road I’ve walked alone and it led me here…
The next step I take will be my first one without chains. I am striving no longer to become but am instead letting go in order to be.
I may let go of old ideas. It’s ok.
I may let go of old practices. It’s ok.
I may let go of old goals. It’s ok.
I may let go of old behaviours. It’s ok.
I may let go of you. It’s ok.
In order to walk a path that doesn’t yet exist, to blaze a new trail of discovery, I can carry only what is mine… and the ground beneath my feet has not yet learned how to whisper “this way” or “that way” and that’s ok because the whisper from my soul grows louder by the moment and that message is clear: “My darling you already are.”
The path I choose is not the path of pain, it is not the path of despair, it is not the path of fools… I choose the path of petals.
The Path of Petals is my new ascension training course for self discovery and self-mastery that I will be delivering starting this March for anyone who is interested in joining and who lives locally to Sheffield UK. More details will be available soon and an online version will follow.
More later… x