It would be really easy to turn back now. Compromising the hard work you have already put into your self-love journey. That’s the cost of fear: self-sabotage. But what if you knew that where you are right now, it’s just a few more steps to liberation?
This looks different on the surface for all of us. It doesn’t matter who you are, what you have experienced or what your outer circumstances look like, the actual energetic landscape of our lives has been altered irrevocably.
For me, the virus is incidental to the massive shifts that have occured this year. If anything it has simply provided the space for the other stuff to play out. My business has changed dramamtically as a matter of choice not force. I have endured not one, but two bereavements. I have underlying health imbalances that I am managing behind the scenes, but what is most significant is that I am waking up.
That is a strange thing for a spiritual teacher to say when it seems necessary for one to already be awake to do this work. Yet, there are layers upon layers of ascending levelsand when it comes to The Grail, seeing the obvious energetic nature of things is one level of awakening, forgiving it’s discordance or the chaos is another. Acceptance is yet another still, but there is a level of awakening where all the observing of what we term reality, shifts into pure alchemy, grounding Heaven here on Earth.
Self-love is a primary gateway to becoming the alchemist. It unlocks an ability to understand your own creative power and just how much control you really do have over your reality. How every action or reaction has a consequence that fundamentally alters the plasticity of the universe around you in ever expanding ripples.
Your own power can be terrifying.
That’s where and why you begin to self-sabotage.
The most frightening experience you can undergo in a spiritual awakening is the one where you stand alone between where you came from and what you are bringing into being. Looking back at what has been removed from your experience and forward to uncertainty. This is the point where your ego is screaming: “Take me back to what I know! I know I can survive that because I’ve done it before.”
All the while your soul is gently whispering: “You never found happiness there. Where I am taking you doesn’t have a road map, but the view is spectacular and those who have already found that place, those are your people.”
Your soul is saying to you: “…Where you are standing now, this is the point where free will determines your ongoing experience. You don’t yet know what to do with your free will because you never understood it’s power before. You never understood YOUR power before, so you begged others to choose for you. Let me remind you what free will gave you up until now: It always gave you a life under par, it always gave you a little less than you wanted, it gave you relationships that drained your life-force, giving nothing in return and it gave you an uncomfortable growing hunger for more. It used you up without ever allowing you to reach your potential. It stole your joy, your thunder and it showed you a reflection in every mirror that you wanted to turn away from. Where you are standing is that mirror. What if you knew for certain that where you are standing, right now, it’s just a few more steps to liberation? Liberation from all of the mediocrity your free will chose for you thus far. Let your free will choose me this time. I, your soul, know the way to your ultimate fulfilment.”
What if you did choose from your soul this time?
To all those of you who are standing on the threshold, having seemingly lost it all. Having the reality you created stripped away to ruins. I want you to know something sacred: let this place of utter devastation be your bedrock upon which to choose yourself this time. Choose your soul. Look at the mirror that is your life and know that you chose it, however hard that knowledge may feel, in order to finally heal your aching heart. Sometimes the only way to heal a heart that aches is to break it completely. Do not try to rebuild it with the pieces that wanted, no, needed to fall away. Build it with the wisdom that this liberation is ushering in and the wildness of inovation that arrives when you are set free.
We do not have to turn from fear and retrace the steps of our past, we can ride alongside fear, befriend it, until love transforms it into faith.
If you trust that its only a few steps more to liberation, refuse to turn back to what feels familiar… well, be the alchemist. You choose the outcome.
Sending so much love to those in pain right now, whatever the cause.
Want to know more about The Grail and choosing self-love? Sign up for the newsletter here.
Need help navigating difficult transitions? Work with me here.