Tag Archives: Teamwork

The Good Friday Guide To Conflict Resolution

Do you think JC would have ended up on a cross if people actually knew how to resolve their differences?

I have to confess my post has little or nothing to do with Easter or the crucifixion story, it just seems appropriate to mention Master Jesus at this time of year and ask what he would do… unfortunately for him he was unable to make the other party hear him (probably because Mercury had slid fully into its impression of Michael Jackson’s moonwalk going backwards across the sky and sending communication into a tailspin of misunderstanding, misinterpretation, misrepresentation… in fact just ‘mis’sing the point entirely.

So conflict resolution then?

From a Wholly Grail perspective we may have to throw every one of the 7 Principles at the issue but lets start with Principle 4: I AM Truth…

This Principle should not be deliberately used to prove who is right and who is wrong, it is a universal statement, available to all to make the point that from any one persons point of reference the truth looks very different and so your truth and mine may not essentially match. Let’s start there.

We all make assumptions during conflict about what the other persons agenda is, we imagine their motives from our personal perspective… we are inevitably wrong. Just ask.

“What do you want?”

“What outcome are you hoping for?”

“How do you see this situation resolving itself?”

Remember now that all external conflict is a reflection of an internal conflict that we each have going on too. A battle between your higher self and your ego is in progress all with the intention of protecting your best interests… they just don’t know how to agree on the best course of how to make that happen, so externally you do battle with whatever appears to be threatening your sense of safety.

Victory in conflict is an illusion. For someone to be the victor, someone else has to be the victim… for every winner there is a loser, unless the warring parties learn to listen, and to be honest in their representation of the real issues underlying the antagonism they have towards each other.

Resolution is never the hidden agenda. Winning is. That’s the thing that needs to be determined: “What’s your definition of winning?”

Only compromise can create true resolution and that has to be about two parties coming together to create a win/win scenario.

Love must be the agenda.

This is where we slap in Principle 2: I AM Detached, this allows us to let go of the tight hold we have on our chosen outcome. Follow it with Principle 1: I AM God, without being able to recognise the divinity in your opponent you will never be able to see them as anything but your opponent and therefore you will never truly recognise that you were always on the same team: family.

Now we need the final piece… Principle 7: I AM Open-Hearted, quite simply the perfect balance of give and take.

Whilst this is all very well, the vital ingredient is this:

It takes two people to pull up a chair at the negotiation table… you cannot force a closed mind open, so if that doesn’t work, one must take JC’s approach and turn the other cheek… (and someone ends up crucified).

More later… x

 

How To Avoid Conflict Through Honouring Each Other

The ego is an amazing mechanism that individuates the cosmic soup into a personality recognisable as you. You could say that its the ego that makes you unique and drives you to express that combination of skills and talents and particular gifts that allow you to be an asset in the world to carry out Divine service. The ego gets a bad rep though because of its conflicting agenda when it comes to those gifts.

As a species we are herd animals, we need each other. The ego fights between “fit in,” ” no, stand out.” “Lead,” “no, follow!” “We’re a team,” “no, I’m an individual!” It’s all a bit exhausting and emanates from a fear of not being able to reconcile the physical separation of a human existence with the connectivity of all things that our higher aspects are constantly trying to remind our ego’s.

Conflict between ego’s is an extension of that same irreconcilable internal conversation. Two people who have forgotten the number one Principle of The Wholly Grail: I AM God. This affirmation of Divinity and therefore connectivity simply means I am you and you are me and we fight because we’ve forgotten.

The world needs everything that you have to offer, and so it is with me, and the differences that become apparent when we focus all our attention upon them with a critical, judgmental and unforgiving eye become ugliness as we compile evidence of separation, but when we turn our full attention to what unites us, what similarities and complementary attributes we share, something beautiful emerges… it’s called love.

The universal energy that connects all things exists, whether we choose to acknowledge it’s presence or turn away from it, whether we choose to bury it under hatred and revenge in the name of self-preservation or simply accept that all is fair in love, and that war is actually a masquerade of the most insidious thief that exists: fear.

Conflict can only end by surrendering fear into the arms of love. Love which allows your uniqueness to stand out in service of the team whilst honouring, not coveting, the uniqueness of every member of that team as you honour yourself.

I am you, you are me… when we fight we descend towards mutually assured destruction. I’m not prepared to wound what I honour.

Archangel Zadkiel, The Angel of The Violet Flame, is there to be called upon to transmute fear, conflict and all negative vibrations, settling karmic stories and encouraging all involved to choose a higher path of mercy and love. Let him be our best friend as we all refocus on peace.

More later… x