Tag Archives: Loss

Sad It’s Gone, Happy It Came

May is my absolute favourite month of the year. I just realised it was over and we have arrived into June almost in stealth mode. I was writing in my journal yesterday morning and paused to date the entry, I was overcome with a brief moment of sadness about it’s passing. I wrote: “Sad it’s gone, happy it came” and transformed that moment into deep gratitude for what is, what was and what may still be to come.

Last year, I remember having that same feeling on the Summer Solstice, (which is once again fast approaching). Instead of revelling in the midsummer festivities, I was overcome with a single thought: “it’s all downhill from here!” Not exactly the optimist’s angle of approach to things is it? But then again I was in a much different place last year and at the time I pulled myself up and reminded myself that it was “Flaming June” and there was fun to be had… make hay while the sun shines and all that stuff.

This whole attitude I was temporarily taken in by is about something much more fundamental than just the passing seasons, it’s about the climb, the pursuit, the chase… always having something to look forward to.

Principle 2: I AM Detached, asks that we remain present in the current moment… that, combined with appreciation is the antidote to any ending or at least the associated feelings of loss. The human condition though, for most of us, needs a driving ambition. When we stop climbing we start falling, when we stop growing we start dying. This cyclical force is a natural part of the duality of the entire universe in constant motion… you must honour every part of it, every age, every stage of the great procession.

Whatever you are rising towards now, you will eventually reach and then you must rise towards something new, the next stage of your journey will be different, but it will be equally as beautiful, equally as filled with moments and new memories and just as much an adventure as this current phase.

Give thanks for the climb, gives thanks for the conquer, give thanks for the decline and give thanks for the release… all serves the quest and allows a new beginning to be born again and again. May will come again and that’s something to look forward to while I play nice with the rest of the year.

More later… x

Saturday Oracle – Free Your Mind From Worry

Worry is the single most useless type of thought process you can apply your mind to, and yet it is also a fairly universal preference. I say preference because we have a choice, and if we have a choice and still choose worry then surely it’s because we prefer it? Isn’t it time to free your mind?

This week’s combination includes Principle 5: I AM Liberated, the affirmation of letting yourself out of a prison born of matter with the highly spiritual violet crown chakra. These two are are a prescription for remedial action where worry is concerned.

So the potential for the week ahead then is finding yourself being drawn into negative thought patterns and false beliefs about something or someone, that have been keeping you locked into your current set of circumstances and unable to move forward. It’s important to get to grips with the fact that neither the object nor the individual have any power over you, it is your thoughts about the subject that control your action or inaction.

Interrupting the worry habit is key to rectifying the detrimental effects on your physical and emotional life and there are a few ways you can do that… this particular combination is recommending meditation as an antidote, distraction is another that simply takes you filling idle time where your mind has too much opportunity to wander back to the familiar, with concentrated effort or new learning.

Worry is usually about loss of some kind, whether that be loss of material attachments, loss of status, loss of comfort, loss of tribal bonds and relationships, loss of reputation, loss of health and finally loss of life. Worry won’t fix any of those things and that’s why finding perspective through witnessing your life from a higher platform during meditation can help you firstly release your mental and emotional grip on whatever recurring thought has you held prisoner, and secondly will allow your higher self to switch you to solution based deliberation.

You may not actually be in danger of losing the object of your apparent distress at all and in that case the energy you expend fretting about it may be causing issues of its own.

All 7 Wholly Grail Principles are free to view on my website for a better understanding of how this philosophy works to find peace and freedom in your own life.

More next week… x

 

I’ve Reached My Limit

I’ve been thinking a lot about priorities of late and more specifically what mine are, and then out of the blue at about 1.30 this morning I had a moment of sudden clarity that I’d had everything upside down…

It sometimes takes an emergency to help you re-evaluate your plans for the future and where you yourself fit into them, what you’re willing to accept and where your boundaries truly are. The last two days have been a bit of a whirlwind albeit a short-lived one that have seen the foundation’s of my own reality get a little shaken like the proverbial tower in the tarot deck… luckily the tower didn’t fall this time but it’s only a matter of time before it does… Life is so very precious… love is a gift… family is everything.

My priorities have had me testing the strength of my roots and calculating what I was prepared to give up for something apparently greater for quite some time and I know now what the answer is…

Have you every been in a position where you have had to choose one way of life over another, one person over another, one location over another? I’ve been freeing myself up from all my ties and anchors for years in order to make that choice an easy one but in the early hours of the morning I realised something… I don’t want to. There is something in my current life that I love so very dearly that to leave would be the end of who I truly am… that’s not to say that there isn’t a place for my dreams to arrive and set up camp here, I’ve left the door open and made a space, in my life, in my heart, in my schedule and even in my home to create something amazing, but right here has something for me that the rest of the world is missing and until the inevitable day that she no longer exists in physical form… I’m home.

When you evaluate what’s really true for you, start by focusing on what you already have that you love before you ponder what you haven’t yet got that you would like… that new thing will come with needs, boundaries and conditions… make sure you don’t give up yours to achieve it… your dreams may have to be malleable to accommodate what already exists in your reality. I always ask “What are you prepared to give up?” Well, I’ve reached my limit. Nothing more for now… I’ve been accommodating enough and now it’s someone else’s turn to do the compromising and meet me half way.

Principle 1: I AM God (and I matter)

Principle 2: I AM Detached (and what’s present is what’s important)

Principle 4: I AM Truth (and I won’t ignore what’s true for me now)

Principle 5: I AM Self-Full (and this is what I need).

Priorities change… forgive me if I move you down the list… though you are pretty high up there, the only person at the top… is me.

More later… x

A Grail Knight’s Guide To Handling Heartbreak

There are times along the path that you feel like you’ve completely lost your way. Times when something or someone has such a profound affect upon you that you become disoriented because the inner compass you rely on for direction is spinning with emotion and true north fades to a distant memory, lost among the turmoil of inner thoughts and processes.

How does a Grail Knight deal with heartbreak?

Many years ago I was introduced to my shamanic power animal, Mother Jaguar, a beautiful velvety black big cat with emerald green eyes. Her job is to walk as my constant companion… I was told that if I ever lost the path I should look to her, where I should go she would follow, if I didn’t know the next step she would lead and if I ever completely lost the way I should retrace my steps back to see where she was waiting patiently and there would be the point where I took a wrong turn, so that I may choose differently.

So ok, that’s how I find my way back to the original plan, the path as it were was simply constructed from a series of hopes and dreams and the individual joyful steps towards creating/achieving said hopes and dreams… but that doesn’t answer the question of how a Grail Knight deals with heart break does it?

You leaving the path is one thing but supposing one of the requisite parts of your plan (or your hopes and dreams) leaves the path instead? Suddenly your path becomes unbalanced, lonely, treacherous even. You cannot visualise how the dream can come to fruition without that significant cog in the machine playing its role the way you hoped it would… now the goal itself looks like a lesser version of itself and you’re not sure you even want to pursue it… in extreme cases it might be the case that you have no inclination towards pursuing any dream at all, such is the blow, the loss… but that’s what happens when you presume to understand the finer details of manifestation, the details that only The Divine Orchestrater has any real power over…

The heartbreak is a result of attachment, the blatant disregard for Principle 2: I AM Detached and its lessons in being present and not projecting into the future, but this isn’t a lesson in “I told you so” it’s a lesson in healing…

A Grail Knight feels pain simply because a Grail Knight is human, like all other humans. Heartbreak has to be felt, processed, worked through. Principle 3: I AM Human isn’t a “get out of jail free card”, it’s a genuine vessel of grace, forgiveness and compassion offering a place of respite when we get it wrong. A place to heal without recrimination or self judgement and a place in which all parties are free.

So what is a Grail Knight’s guide to handling heartbreak?

Breathe. This too shall pass and the sun will rise again tomorrow. Take off the armour for now and surrender to what is… the why changes nothing, don’t search for it. Should the cog decide to rejoin the path at a later juncture, leave the door open for in that lives the essence of an open heart. And if by some miracle this is the case then the why can be explored to ensure open communication can recommence embracing “I AM Truth.”

I found Mother Jaguar sitting way back at a crossroads…”This is a really nice place to sit and wait” so here I’ll take off my armour, sit and breathe, heal, perhaps shed a few tears, surrender and wait for Divine Direction on the next step.

I AM Human.

More later… (maybe, if it’s still the path) x

The Empty Space

Grail Oracle 6Grail Oracle Green

The Intuitive Chalice Oracle was designed to help the querent to understand the flow of energy instructing their own personal Grail and thus informing their life from day to day, cycle to cycle. I have found it to be a very effective tool in deciding where to focus healing energy and change within my own life and, since sharing weekly readings with you, I’ve noticed how it mirrors the universal currents affecting many of us who are sensitive to the changes occuring at a much deeper level.

Today’s combination of Principle 6: I AM Self-Full and the emerald green of the heart chakra, is creating The Empty Space. As with all Grail readings this empty space can have both positive and negative connotations to the way we feel about our lives.

Imagine if you will the wide open spaces of nature and how we can feel either relieved by the removal of boundaries and the space to breathe or we can feel very alone.

If you read my Free Grail Insight yesterday (Catch a Glimmer), you will understand that I was expressing gratitude for my mum, especially as its Mother’s day in the UK tomorrow. Im very aware though at this time that many of you, a very dear friend of mine included, dont have the luxury of having mum here. My gorgeous friend Val lost her mum just a few short weeks ago and is going through this Mother’s Day for the first time, feeling a distinct loss of connection…

But The Empty Space is not just about mum’s, its about separation and the loneliness that we sometimes feel overcome with when the very person that we feel the need to be near is no longer available to us either through death, emotional or geographical separation. I feel the angst of those who are longing for that connection and my heart goes out to each and every one of you who is experiencing loss or loneliness, not just now, but always.

The healing message within this card though comes from the Self-Full aspect, directing you to find peace within this situation as you remember that life doesn’t leave gaps for no reason and that The Empty Space is waiting to be filled… Filled with joy, love, abundance and most of all filled with you… You see the only thing that you are actually separated from is yourself. As everything in the universe is intimately connected, separation in the energetic sense is actually impossible and the feelings, sensations, emotions and experiences that you felt when with the person who is now missing from your life for whatever reason, are still inherent within you.

Place your attention fully on what, not who is missing and then go and find that thing for yourself… don’t be tempted to search for it from another person, Self-Full means “I AM Whole, I AM Healed and I AM Grateful” and when you fill that sacred chalice with the light of your own soul you become irresistable to the next phase and influx of love energy… That’s why this is called The ‘WHOLLY’ Grail. Separation is a choice.

More next week… x